Execution to Take Place Today

Tonight, John Allen Muhammad, is set to be executed by lethal injection in Virginia. His appeal to the Supreme Court to intervene was denied, and this morning, governor Tim Kaine, refused clemency, Muhammad’s last shot at being able to see tomorrow.

Muhammad was responsible for the 2003, sniper attacks in the Washington D.C. area that left 10 dead, 6 injured, families in grief and citizens afraid to come out of their homes, afraid to send their children to the bus stop in fear that they would be shot. Make no mistake, the crimes that this man committed were grave, disturbing, and completely immoral. However, two wrongs never make a right. Executing Muhammad will not bring back those killed. Murdering Muhammad will not undo what has been done, it will only compound the guilt and the sin of these events. Yes, Muhammad needs to pay for what he has done, he needs to be punished in some manner, but killing him is not the answer.

For some, the belief is that killing him is the right answer. If Muhammad is dead, the victims will have closure, will be at peace. But will they? I can’t pretend to know the answer to that, but somehow I doubt that supporting the taking of another’s life will bring peace and closure. Will it really cure the heartache of a murdered family member or friend? Again I cannot pretend to know the answers. The only thing I do know is that murder is wrong.

Of course there are always exceptions to the rule, like defending your own life from being taken, however, for 6 years now, the D.C. community has been safe from Muhammad, he is locked up and cannot get to anyone, therefore, this death is not in self defense. This death is immoral, and the guilt of it will be on the state of Virginia for all time. We have to become a society that holds our brothers and sisters with respect, no matter what they have done. We have got to be the bigger person, no matter how difficult it is. We can not repay injustice with injustice. We have to learn to turn the other cheek, especially those of us who are Christians. We have to set an example and live by and support the maxims taught to us by Christ.

“You have heard that it was said, “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, Don not resist one who is evil. But if any one strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also; and if any one would sue you and take your coat, let him have your cloak as well; and if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to him who begs from you and do not refuse him who would borrow from you.”

Matthew 5:38-42

We should not be a nation of vengeance, but a nation of mercy, of clemency, one that brings real justice, real healing, not one that lets our emotions run our justice system. Again, Muhammad needs to be punished, but this is not the answer. Do we not know that all of us truly deserve to be where he is. Have we not all committed crimes against our neighbors? We are all capable of doing what Muhammad did, we are capable of the extreme anger, of the mindset, of loosing sight of reason, of going out of control. Can’t we see that executing John Allen Muhammad is exactly that, is reacting to our anger, our fear, our reason?

There is nothing I can do to stop his execution. It is a travesty that it will happen tonight. I pray, though, that our nation will move away from this practice. I pray that those families affected by his actions find true consolation, not this false consolation that will come with his death. I pray that perhaps Gov. Kaine will change his mind and commute his sentence to life in prison. I pray most of all for John Allen Muhammad’s soul, that in his dying moments he might meet our God, our Savior, Jesus Christ, and that he might repent of his sins, like the Prodigal Son and be spared the fires of hell. As our Lady of Fatima prays:

Oh my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell, lead all souls to heaven, especially those in most need of thy mercy.

House of the Rising Sun

What is this “house of the rising sun”? One of the lesser known metaphors is that the house of the rising sun is the slave pens on the plantation. Few of us have seen a slave pen and fewer of us have spent time in one. Well, at least not literally. Haven’t we all spent time in the slave pen? Every single one of us has lived in the house of the rising sun since the moment of our conception, that is, excepting the Blessed Virgin. Each of us tainted with the sin of Adam and Eve, predestined to be enslaved to sin, to our own worldly passions, desires, and lusts. From the moment we were born, we were slaves to sin, obedient to the prince of darkness, the devil. Unable to enjoy the love of God as we were trapped in our slave pens. As we got older we imagined that things would change, that with the right age, and the proper freedoms, we would rid ourselves of our shackles, and be freed from the house of the rising sun, to experience true life.

Yet it probably didn’t happen. The more “freedom” we got, the thicker the walls on our pens got. Along with this further enslavement, came the understanding that we could not get out no matter how badly we tried. Our space became more and more cramped, as more sin entered our pens to stay, slowly suffocating us, slowly snuffing out our souls. The reality hit that the house of rising sun in which we lived was becoming darker and darker.

Don’t we know, though, that Christ has come to redeem us, to invite us into a new house? The House of the Risen Son (clever, I know)? Christ has come to set us free, to unite us to himself, to his body, to his house, his Church, the Body of Christ on earth. He has given us the graces necessary to remain in that house, to grow in that house, to become one with that house. He has given us Baptism, Confirmation, Penance, Holy Communion. He has given us the Saints and each other. He has given us guidance in our priests and bishops and in his Word. Yet, there are those among us, myself included, who have all of this, yet still wander back to our old house, back to those slave pens.

Why? Why do we do it? I do not have the answers. I cannot understand after having seen the Lord, having tasted his goodness, having heard his forgiveness, having been sealed with his fragrant oils, having felt those cleansing waters, how I can willingly crawl back into the dung laden quarters I used to live in. How daft can we be? Does not St. Paul say in Romans:

Do you not know that if you yield yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and having been set free from sin, have become slaves to righteousness. For just as you once yielded your members to impurity and to greater and greater iniquity, so now yield your members to righteousness for sanctification. What return did you get from the things of which you are now ashamed? The end of those things is death. But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the return you get is sanctification and its end, eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

-Romans 6:16-18, 19b-23

Then again those are those of us still living in the slave pens, who have heard of this better house, who have had the doors of our pens left open, who have wandered outside of the house of the rising sun and into the house of the risen Son, which coincidentally exists everywhere which the house of the rising sun does not. These have seen the glory of God, yet refuse, for one reason or another to see it. These remind us of the poor little dwarfs in The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis, who despite being in a beautiful meadow, truly believe that they are in a smelly stable, and when presented with a flower, believe it is dung. How sad, how pitiful, how unbelievably despairing, that they would prefer the slave pens than the redemption, blessings, and graces of our God and Father through Jesus Christ.

What is my point? Where am I going with all of this, these metaphors, and loose correlations with Scripture and novels for children? I guess my point is that we cannot continue to choose to live in the house of the rising sun. We cannot, no matter who we are, continue going back to that wretched place. Whether you are a Christian: Catholic or Protestant, or a non-Christian, but especially us Christians. We know that the things that exist in that pen only bring death. Those of us who have been brought into life have no business returning to that place. It only brings us more sorrow, only weakens the message of our new master to the ones who still live there. If those who live there still see us, who have lived outside, return, they will never believe that living outside is better, and will never come to this better house. And that is a grand travesty.

White Rabbit

I’m chasing something.

And I’ve been chasing it for a long time, trying to catch it. But I still haven’t. Am I close? I do not know.

This something is my destiny, is my calling, is my place in life. I tried catching it as a Business major, and a Natural Resources major, and as a zoology major. I’ve tried it is a non-Christian, as a Protestant, and now as a Catholic. I know I am closer than I ever have been before. As I chase this white rabbit, it is leading me, in eleven short days, to a weekend at Cardinal Muench Seminary. What will I find there? Hopefully answers. Hopefully something that resembles what I have been looking for, although, seeing as how I do not actually know what it is I am trying to find, I don’t know if I will know if the weekend will resemble it.

I know what I want to find, though. I want to find that I am called to the priesthood. Why? I don’t know, but the last five months or so, since considering the possibility of becoming a priest have really changed me. I mean really changed me. I was scared at first of thought of becoming a priest, well, that part hasn’t really changed. I was nervous about the idea of changing my major once again, because what if this isn’t where I’m supposed to go? But now I feel a little more at peace. I feel as if this could bring me great joy, the joy I’ve been looking for. I feel like it could fulfill me more than any job at any zoo in any city ever could. I feel it in my bones, as if this is what my very existence is for.

Then again, maybe I’m just chasing a dream. Maybe this, this feeling, maybe its not really out there. But what if it is? My parents. They don’t want me to chase it. They want me to play it safe, to stay “grounded” in all that it means to reach the American dream. They don’t want me to see if I am called. They don’t understand that I don’t have a choice but to explore it and see. They don’t understand that the God of this universe makes each of us for a purpose, and that I must find out what my purpose is. And the only way for me to do that is to chase this white rabbit. I have to chase the rabbit, stalk it, follow it, catch it, and see if it has anything to say to me. I have to tell them this. I have to make them understand.

I have to find this rabbit no matter what the cost.

-NDB

“If I were looking for a white rabbit, I’d ask the Mad Hatter.”
-The Cheshire Cat-

Health Care Being Voted on Today

As you’ve probably heard, the health care bill is being voted on today (it is wee early morning hours right now), and as it stands “Pelosicare” is unacceptable. See American Papist for more details.

It’s probably too late to contact your congressman or congresswoman to ask them to vote “no” on the bill, but it is never too late to pray to God, to ask for his intervention. And let us, too, ask St. Gianna Molla to offer up her prayers on behalf of our nation, of our unborn, of all Americans, who are made in the sacred image of our Lord and God.

-NDB

Wiser Than I

From Fallible Blogma.

“Now a Catholic is a person who has plucked up courage to face the incredible and inconceivable idea that somebody else may be wiser than he is.”

-GK Chesterton

In otherwords, as Catholics, we are admitting that we need Jesus’ Church. We are admitting that He gave us this Church for a reason – to guide us and sanctify us. As Catholics we submit to this guidance. We admit that we are not our own pope. We do not personally have the authority to interpret scripture authoritatively. On certain things, we do not have the authority to tell Jesus’ Church it is wrong. And even when we do disagree or have trouble understanding, we question with obedience. We work to understand better.

We have the humility to know that our perspective may not be better than the perspective of a 2000 year old Church founded by Jesus himself and given the authority to bind and to loose, to forgive sins, and to feed His sheep. An institution given the protection and guidance of the Holy Spirit at Pentacost.

We don’t start our own churches. We join Christ’s Church.

We recognize that we need the grace of the sacraments. We recognize that being Catholic is believing in all of the teachings of the Church, not just choosing the ones we like and discarding the others.

Ultimately, we recognize that our faith, our Catholicism, is not something we mold to our life. It’s something we mold our life to.

Another Sign?

Not only are very few of the classes I need to graduate being offered, but there is something wrong with the registration website and I cannot register for those that are. A sign that I should be in seminary?

Mwah-mwah…..

I talked to my mom.

It was inevitable, Catholicism came up. We struck a deal that I would go to Christmas Eve service with my brother and sister at First Baptist, and that they would go to midnight Mass with me at the Basilica of St. Mary’s. My mom told me she was pretty sure that they would be agreeable, but that she didn’t know if my dad would be.

What?!

I had no idea that my dad felt this way. He has said very little to me about my faith, and I took it as his usual self. He doesn’t really discuss religion, but I had no idea that he felt this way about my decision. My mom said that he was ok with me being Catholic when I was just going to a Catholic Church. But now that I am discerning the priesthood, he is rather irritated by the fact that I am Catholic. I barely know what to think. Their express concern is the inability for me to be married after ordination. “What if you meet a girl afterwards?” or “Aren’t there any nice Catholic girls in your parish?”

That’s where the frustration comes in. I don’t think that either of my parents are big subscribers to the idea that God might have a specific purpose and plan for our lives. I’ll admit, their lives have been less than picture perfect. But that doesn’t mean that God does not call each of us to a specific purpose. For right now, it looks as if God is calling me this way, and so I must go this way, and if its not where God is calling me I will be redirected. But my parents see my end goal, my purpose as to bring them grandchildren. That’s been their goal for me my entire life. Not a bad goal by any means, but it just might not be my goal or my purpose. Right now, I’m just a bit frustrated and wished I hadn’t talked to my mom today. At the same time though, I guess I am glad that I know how they really feel, not that it changes anything.

On a brighter note, one of my friends grew up Catholic, but has been going through a difficult time figuring Christianity out wants to talk to me about Catholicism, so my prayers for him have been heard after all!

Heavenly Father,
Pour your wisdom and grace into my parents, that they may see that seeking your will above our own wills is the only way to true peace and happiness in our lives. Amen.

Blessed Virgin Mary,
Help my mother and my father to submit to God’s will in the same way you did. Comfort them as they are afflicted with the difficulty that having a son discerning the priesthood can bring. Pray for their conversions. Amen.

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus,
Have mercy on our souls, bind us to your heart, uniting our afflictions with your own, that we may be perfected in your sanctifying and loving grace, that we may have the strength to drink from the cup and follow you. Amen.

Isle Royale

Thanks Ethan for listening to The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald in the office. Got me to wikipedia-ing, and soon I found myself looking at the only island National Park in the country, Isle Royale in Lake Superior. I decided that I am going to go camping there this summer because it looks like an awesome place and I haven’t actually been camping in about 5 years, and that is sad because I used to love going camping.

November Saint

Holiness. It’s something we all desire to grow in, right? We want to become more like Christ, we want to become as holy as we can so that we can glorify God, commune with God fully, and to lead others into the light of faith. Blessed Francis Xavier Seelos (1819-1867) once made a list of ten things that help to form us in holiness. The eighth item on that list is to choose a special patron saint each month and to imitate them in some virtue. At first, I thought that that was kind of lame. But it does make sense. At some point if we want to become holy we have to actually put some effort into it. So, I decided that this month, I am choosing St. Anthony the Abbot as a patron.

One of the things about him that I think would be great to imitate is that he imitated others. When a holy person came around, he would go to see them and imitate what they did. I’m going to imitate an imitator. Look at those around me, those I consider to be holy, to be close to Christ, devoted to God. There is also a story about when he heard a sermon about the rich young man in Matthew 19, he got up, left, and sold all he had except what was needed for his sister and him to live on.  St. Anthony of Abbot, was utterly devoted to Christ, to imitating him and his saints, that he might be holy, sacrificing anything for the sake of the Gospel. That is something we should all desire.

-NDB

Duties Toward God

This just happened to be smack dab in the middle of the Scriptures I was reading today and it really hit me:

My son, if you come forward to serve the Lord, remain in justice and in fear, and prepare yourself for temptation. Set your heart right and be steadfast, incline your ear, and receive words of understanding, and do not be hasty in time of calamity. Await God’s patience, cling to him and do not depart, that you may be wise in all your ways. Accept whatever is brought upon you, and endure it in sorrow; in changes that humble you be patient. For gold and silver are tested in the fire, and acceptable men in the furnace of humiliation. Trust in God, and he will help you; hope in him, and he will make your ways straight. Stay in fear of him, and grow old in him.

-Sirach 2:1-6

God really knows what I need to hear. “If you are called to serve the Lord, remain in justice and in fear, and prepare yourself for temptation.” Good advice I need to start taking, because I am called to serve the Lord. “Await God’s patience.” I need to be patient, waiting for God to speak, but then acting upon what he says to me. I need to be accepting and enduring all that comes my way, to grow my character, to grow my trust.  Trust in him, hope in him, and I will grow old with him.

Lord God,
Help me to hope in you, trust in you, fear you. Help me to remain in justice and in fear, to be prepared for temptation. Help me to be patient and wise. Help me to heed the call to serve you. Amen.

Mother Mary, St. Paul, and all the Saints, pray for me, be a model for me, guide me in safety to Christ. Amen.

-NDB